Mike Saltzman"]

    If that doesn't help, it may be that the row is not actually selected, but rather Active. The default ActiveRowAppearance mimics the selected row appearance. So if that's the case, what you need to do is go into the property grid at Design-time and go to the grid.DisplayLayout.Override and find the ActiveRowAppearance and ActiveCellAppearance properties and Reset them.  

I was having the same problem, and this fixed it. Thanks! 

 Doing this in AfterSelectChange is a little wasteful. You only need to do this once, you don't need to do it for every row. I would recommend doing it at Design-time or in the InitializeLayout event of the grid. 

 Thanks for your answer, i solved the problem with the following code

private void ultraGridAttributes_AfterSelectChange(object sender, AfterSelectChangeEventArgs e)
        {
            if (ultraGridAttributes.Selected.Rows != null)
            {
                if (!ultraGridAttributes.Selected.Rows.Contains(ultraGridAttributes.ActiveRow))
                {
                    ultraGridAttributes.DisplayLayout.Override.ActiveRowAppearance.BackColor = Color.Transparent;
                }
                else
                {

                    //The original highlight color                   
                    ultraGridAttributes.DisplayLayout.Override.ActiveRowAppearance.BackColor = SystemColors.Highlight;
                }
            }
        }

In that case, I am pretty sure that my last paragraph above is the answer. If that row still appears highlight but is not in the Selected.Rows collection, it must be because that row is the ActiveRow, not a selected row. So you need to turn off the ActiveRowAppearance/ActiveCellAppearance.